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So tell me when the kiss of love becomes a lie

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Monday, January 25th, 2010
2:15 pm - i am still alive.
and working still, it's been a year since i started here. so that's cool i guess. I wonder if everyone has forgoten about this place becuase i have.

(i would wait for you forever)

Tuesday, May 26th, 2009
10:13 am - wa wa waaaaa
got into a car accident. I'm ok, my passenger is ok. My car isn't.

it's in the shop now. and i hope to have a new car come January or December. TIME TO START SAVING!! :)

(i would wait for you forever)

Tuesday, February 17th, 2009
1:23 pm


I'm on VACATION in 2 weeks yo!!!!!!




So it's final, since about 2 weeks ago.

There have been lots of changes going on lately too; in little things mostly. But these little things will have a large effect. So it's exciting.


I recently bought a new mattress, it's like air. I should be able to go pick it up today. But they haven't called yet.

HOW EXCITING!! Yeah, i know it's just a bed, but I **hate** my bed with nearly every fiber in my body...this new one should be much better. :)

And that's just about all the news I have.

Well, I have also been into making play lists on YouTube.
They're nothing great, but I want a play list for each type of music that I like, and that's a lot.
Here are the categories I have so far :
Trance/Ambient
Chill/indie
Popular and Radio friendly
Now that's what I want to hear AKA nostalgia

That’s it so far and not all of them have been created, there are about 40 songs on the Trance playlist as there seems to be a lot of pretty cool trance out there. I like the electronica feel lately.
But also I have broadened my horizons as far as music is concerned.
I still have "Now that's what I want to hear" but that's mostly the hardcore and rock that I was really into in High school. Lots of Thrice and some Finch, emery and what have. Where as the Trance is mostly ATB a little Paul Van Dyk and one Sylver. Then Chill/indie is more of the DCFC esq. Maybe a little ingrid, of course The Postal Service, Mogwai and The Album leaf, the Shinns and probably the sound track to Nick and Nora. Popular is mostly JT as I have really been feeling him lately, Rhianna and perhaps even some TI! I know! I know! :) Now of course there's going to be a classical play list for those days that you need to slow down. :) I am actually looking to learn the Piano since i have one now. I think I could be able to do it if I dedicate myself.

That's enough about music.
You know, I think I am the only one left in the world that doesn't have an IPod or Zune, every time i go to get one i find something better to spend my money on. And the fact that I have lots of music on my phone helps too. But I think next i am planning on saving up for a laptop or a TV. I really want a new TV. I know I don’t really need one just yet, but it's just something that I really want. lol But I will probably just get what I know i need first. So i am just going to save again once my vacay is over.
I have also been considering going on a Cruise. They're really not too expensive and I think it would be fun. :) just for 4 days. But then again all there is to do is hit the buffet (from what I hear) and I am not down with that. So I may just find some place else to go or something else to do. I hope though that I make it to NY for a few days, maybe only 2 so i can have time to hang out with as many people as possible.

I feel it. I just felt it. Similar to a shift in the plates of the earth. . . I need to readjust myself. Remain focused, I need to work on that and be dedicated as I know how in many ways I have fallen short. I need to regain my balance and breathe life into my relationship. I know it's possible if you help me.
I love you.

By the way it's officially been 13 months since we started dating. How time flies.

(i would wait for you forever)

Monday, December 22nd, 2008
1:58 pm - Play list for the week... and I dont think it will last any longer than that week.
What I’ve been feeling like lately.

I usually like my weird music. . . lately I have been listening to POP! Lol

Here’s my Play list for today 69 (the 69 is Kat's doing)

1. JT – Cry Me a River
2. JT- What goes around
3. JT- My love
4. TI feat. JT – Dead and Gone
5. Rihanna – Rehab
6. TuPac – Dear Mama
7. Brittney Spears – Every time
8. Paramour – Decode
9. Paramour – that’s what you get
10. Paramour – misery business
11. Taylor Swift – Love story
12. Jason Mraz – I’m Yours
13. Kanye West – love lockdown
14. Kanye West – Heartless

(i would wait for you forever)

Tuesday, December 16th, 2008
4:38 pm
So things are good. Just started a new job - I love the benefits!! It's so exciting for me to feel like a adult. LOL, how pathetic.
At least I have maintained a good sense of humor over my lack of maturity! LOL. Things are moving along, a year has gone by so fast. I dosn't feel like a Year. I feel like time is moving faster and faster as they years move along. I am so ready to go home right now.

I didn't get as much done as I did yesterday, but I still feel accomplished. Well. . . really looking at it I accomplished just as much if not a little more in the time I have had to work. I mean, I was late 45 mins due to traffic. Now that's crazy, considering I left my house at nearly an hour before i needed to be at work. Every one was late today, lots of people didn't come in at all. Craziness.

Sigh. I have been missing old friends lately. Namely those in other states. . . and that i haven't spoken to in a few years. . . It's wierd still feeling so close to them and I haven't spoken to them in about 3 years now. Wierd. :/ But I do really miss talking to them, IMing. . . and video chating. lol. good times then. :D

Well time to leave work.

Maybe i will update more often. . . Maybe.

(i would wait for you forever)

Friday, August 29th, 2008
2:38 pm
oh by the way i turn 22 today. not that it matters. i just completely forgot about it and i think that is really funny.

(i would wait for you forever)

Wednesday, December 5th, 2007
12:00 pm - uh...i am alive?
Dont you hate it when your washing and you find more lights that need to be washed...but you already WASHED all the light? lol. I hate that. O well.
Uh as of lately I am doing good. great. Fantastic! I feel like I have come into my own. So far I have lost 20 pounds and my goal is at least 5 more by the end of December. I am surrounded by good influences and this is my first month to auxillary pioneer. I am already way behind on my hours... so i am afraid that I wont make it. But I am going to try my best. I think I can do it.
I am sick. I have been sick off and on for a while (since like...October) and I FINALLY went to the doctor. He said i needed antibiotics because it wont go away by its self. I was hoping that it would! lol. SO yeah 2 months of being sick and I finally go to the doctor.
that's about it. The end.

(i would wait for you forever)

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006
1:27 pm
Alright, so maybe i am... just a little.

(i would wait for you forever)

Monday, November 27th, 2006
9:52 pm - this song made me lol
Four years you think for sure
That’s all you've got to endure
All the total dicks
All the stuck up chicks
So superficial, so immature
Then when you graduate
You take a look around and you say HEY WAIT
This is the same as where I just came from
I thought it was over
Aw that’s just great

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and who‘s having sex,
Who‘s got the money, who gets the hunnie's,
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess
And you still don’t have the right look
And you don’t have the right friends
Nothing changes but the faces, the names, and the trends
High school never ends

Check out the popular kids
You’ll never guess what Jessica did
How did Mary Kate lose all that weight
And Katie had a baby so I guess Tom’s straight
And the only thing that matters
Is climbing up that social ladder
Still care about your hair and the car you drive
Doesn’t matter if you’re sixteen or thirty-five

Reese Witherspoon,
She’s the prom queen
Bill Gates,
Captain of the chess team
Jack Black, the clown
Brad Pitt, the quarterback
Seen it all before
I want my money back

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who’s the best dressed and who’s having sex,
Who’s in the clubs and who’s on the drugs,
Who’s throwing up before they digest
And you still don’t have the right look
And you don’t have the right friends
And you still listen to the same shit you did back then
High school never ends

High school never ends

The whole damn world is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and who‘s having sex,
Who‘s got the money, who gets the hotties,
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess
And I still don’t have the right look
And I still have the same three friends
And I’m pretty much the same as I was back then
High school never ends

High school never ends

High school never ends

Here we go again

(i would wait for you forever)

Friday, September 29th, 2006
11:30 pm
Forwards

Backwards, way trippy


Lyrics
Come up to meet you, tell you Im sorry
You dont know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions
Oh lets go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a silence apart

Nobody said it was easy
Oh its such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said that it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start
I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh its such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
Im going back to the start

(i would wait for you forever)

Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
5:52 pm - I want to know your plans
I want to know your plans and how involved in them I am.
When I go to sleep for good, will I be forgiven?
And if you want roses, I'll buy a bouquet.
If that just won't cut it, well what can I say?

You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead.
Strength in my bones put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you, 'cause that's what
you do.

I want to know your fears, from your feet to the back of your ears.
When they raise the landing gear, will your heart stay here?
If you could forgive me for being so brash, you could hit me or whip
me,
I'd savor each lash.

You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead.
Strength in my bones and the words in my head.
They pour out to paper, it's all for you, 'cause that's
what you do.

No more fighting.
This is only a waste of our time.
Soon we'll be leaving.
Will this strength still be mine?

I'll look out for you, till I die, till I rot.
I'll remember you, till I die, till I rot.

You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead.
Strength in my bones, put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you..

You're what keeps me believing the worlds not gone dead.
Strength in my bones, put the words in my head.
When they pour out to paper, it's all for you, 'cause that's
what you do.

(i would wait for you forever)

Sunday, September 3rd, 2006
10:12 pm




"A Movie Script Ending"

Whenever i come back, the air on railroad is making the same sounds.
And the shop fronts on holly are dirty words (asterisks in for the vowels).
We peered through the windows... new bottoms on barstools but the people remain the same, with prices inflating.

As if saved from the gallows.
There's a bellow of buzzers and the people stop working and they're all so excited.

Passing through unconscious states.
When i awoke i was on the highway.

With your hand on my shoulders, a meaningless movement... a moviescript ending,
And the patrons are leaving, leaving.

Now we all know the words were true in the sappiest songs (yes, yes).
I'll put them to bed, but they won't sleep, they're just shuffling the sheets, they toss and turn,
(you can't begin to get it back).

Passing through unconscious states.
When i awoke i was on
The onset of a later stage... the headlights are beacons on the highway.

(i would wait for you forever)

Sunday, July 16th, 2006
12:27 am
Zao - The Dreams That Don't Come True Lyrics

I tried again I fell again to find out for myself
It hurts for a life time
You picture rests there for a lifetime
And for a lifetime I will dream of you
I prepare a mantle inside of my heart
With your photograph to sooth the scars
Unable to be erased unable to be forgotten
As I grow older I will dream

(i would wait for you forever)

Tuesday, June 27th, 2006
9:58 pm


threw you the obvious and you flew
with it on your back, a name in your recollection,
thrown down among a million same.
difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed
and passed over
when i've looked right through
to see you naked and oblivious
and
you don't see me.but i threw you the obvious
just to see if there's more behind the eyes
of a fallen angel,
the eyes of a tragedy.
here i am expecting just a little bit
too much from the wounded.
but i see through it all
and see you.
so i threw you the obvious
to see what occurs behind the eyes of a fallen angel,
eyes of a tragedy.
oh well. apparently nothing.
you don't see me.
you don't see me at all.

(2 you know s | i would wait for you forever)

1:21 am
i'll be the grapes fermented, bottled and
served with the table set in my finest suit
like a perfect gentleman.
i'll be the fire escape that's bolted to the
ancient brick where you will sit and
contemplate your day.

i'll be the waterwings that save you if you
start drowning in an open tab when your
judgement's on the brink.
i'll be the phonograph that plays your favorite
albums back as your lying there drifting off
to sleep.
i'll be the platform shoes and undo what
heredity's done to you: you won't have to
strain to look into my eyes.
i'll be your winter coat buttoned and zipped
straight to the throat with the collar up so
you won't catch cold.

i want to take you far away from the cynics in this
town and kiss you on the mouth.
we'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of
this scene, start a brand new colony
where everything will change, we'll give
ourselves new names (identities erased.)
the sun will heat the ground under our bare
feet in this brand new colony.
everything will change...

(i would wait for you forever)

Sunday, April 30th, 2006
5:12 pm
Seriously, I think that
Skid Row


Was way ahead of thier time. . .

(i would wait for you forever)

Thursday, April 13th, 2006
3:05 pm
nothing going on at.all.

the end.

(i would wait for you forever)

Saturday, March 18th, 2006
3:41 am
I can hear Joey snoring from here...and i think i'd soon like to do the samee. ... G-ma Zoila is going to get here tomorrow and i know I'll be waken (woken, awaken, awoken - whatever) up early to clean up "spik and span" - that's quickly becomming one of my most hated phrases in life, sort of like "pet peeve" OMG how I hate that word. hah, I'm odd, i know. but that's just me I guess. I need a buddy, or a cork boar. I want one too. a huge one to take up space above my bed. and it'll help me keep track of all my crap. and remind me of thigns too. and I want to get annother journal. . . but seeing as how i dont have cash right now. OH and That company called me for an interview today. I was unable to get back to them because I didn't get the message until 6, and I'm sure no one was there so monday I am going to call and set up an interview. I'm excited and kind of nervouse. It's suppose to pay well and I'm pretty sure that I can handle it. . . i hope I can.

What is this Wonka, some sort of fun house??

WHY ARE YOU HAVING FUN?

(2 you know s | i would wait for you forever)

3:32 am - how spoiled I am...stolen from ashley.
THANKS ASHHHHHHHCollapse )



BYEE

(i would wait for you forever)

Friday, March 3rd, 2006
8:56 pm - It's been a while.
Nothing as usual. Yet annother night at home. . . I HAD something to say and now I can't remember...whatever.maybelater.

(2 you know s | i would wait for you forever)

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